Dr Green

So this is a game I finished a month or two ago that I got off Steam for essentially no money and while I wasn't really expecting anything I was pleasantly surprised by this simple yet fun platformer.

So the game starts out and you are introduced to Dr Green, a kid who was abandoned in the forest and grew up with the critters.  Eventually some evil dudes come and try to tear his forest down in order to put up a parking lot (not literally) and it is up to you as Dr Green to fight them off and send their evil building projects packing.

The game itself is very simple, just move to the right, shoot the dudes and reach the end of the stage.  Once you get there fight a boss then rinse and repeat the process until the end of the game.  The game, which it admits to on the steam page, is clearly inspired by games like Megaman which is fine but the game doesn't really try to do anything new or unique.  You aren't going to be getting any kind of breath of fresh air here but what you are getting is a solid platformer with some pretty good level design and nice music.

Since the game is so simple and so solidly put together its really hard to find anything to complain about but there were a few little things that pissed me off.  The levels themselves, especially the later ones are actually quite challenging which was nice but every single boss the game has to offer is a complete easy mode pushover.  If you are any kind of good at mashing the fire button then the bosses will be even less challenging and it's a shame that each level ends on such a low note.  Also while I didn't run into many glitches there was one moment where I died during a boss phase transition and the game soft locked and I had to do the whole fucking stage over.  Nothing deal breaking but just a few annoyances.

The game was obviously designed for speed running as each stage has a timer and the game itself isn't particularly long.  Then again, it's insanely cheap at £2 and it is worth picking up if you're looking for something short, cheap and fun in order to kill a lazy weekend with.  Give it a go, if you like this kind of thing you won't be disappointed

Into The Gloom

Into the Gloom is a strange little horror game I picked up on Steam for about £2.  It's indie developed and it has pixel graphics but don't let that put you off because we have something that's actually half decent on our hands.

Story wise you play as a first unnamed protagonist who wakes up in a hospital completely alone.  As you walk around you find blood smears and eventually a dead body that has been hung to the ceiling.  It's up to you to escape from the hospital and get away from whatever it may be that stalks you in the darkness.

(Minor Spoilers Ahead)

After your first play through you find out that you are a young man who is stuck in a coma and you are wandering around the inside of his conscience.  Being found and killed by the strange figure at the end of the game gets you the bad ending which involves a highly depressing sequence about how you bankrupt your family and everyone forgets you.

(End Spoilers)

Game play in Into The Gloom is fairly simple.  You have to wander around, find items and solve puzzles.  There isn't much in terms of combat but that's because there aren't really any enemies.  Over time you find notes that help with puzzles and give you more insight into the story.  The puzzles in Into The Gloom are actually pretty good since they seem really obtuse and stupid at first but once you realise what's going on then they are deceptively simple.

I've only played up to the first ending at time of writing but as you make runs of the game it "unlocks" more notes for you to find which in turn unlocks more puzzles for you to piece the mystery together.  The game is quite short but there are 5 or 6 different endings for you to find so it may take you a little longer to get everything than first thought.

Horror-wise, the game isn't all that scary (at least to me) but you can tell that some genuine effort has been made to lay on atmosphere rather than relying on cheapo jump scares for lets play bait.  There are a few jump scares but the ones I encountered in my first run weren't all that common and one of them did get me pretty good without being too over the top.  Maybe for someone a bit more sensitive the atmosphere of Into the Gloom may take hold but if you're a big fan of horror games then it may fall a bit flat.

All that said, for the price tag I'd say it's absolutely worth a shot.  It's a very simple game that you can enjoy in a short, lazy evening and once beaten there is a good bit of replay value to be had in order to get the extra endings.  Put it this way, if you had a  choice between Into the Gloom and The Evil Within, I'd say go for this one.  You'll save a shit ton of money and be a hell of a lot less disappointed. 

Sweezy Gunner

What the fuck is a Sweezy? Does not knowing that make me stupid?  Well I'm sure someone will tell me.

Sweezy Gunner is a game I bought during the Steam summer sale for exactly £0 thanks to DotA providing me with large amounts of Steam credit and this game being really goddamn cheap.  I didn't really know what to expect when I first started playing other than that the game was sort of a shmup but not really.

So what is Sweezy Gunner?  Well, it's like of a mix between a shmup game and Metroid.  You have a big world to explore and as you go around you collect power ups like life containers, huge coins, badges and other things to make yourself more bad ass.  After some exploring you'll eventually come to a dungeon and when you get to the end of a dungeon you'll fight a boss.  Upon victory you'll get a power that will let you cross water/lava, smash gates or break boulders which in turn opens up more of the world for you.

As you explore you have plenty of things to shoot at which are also shooting at you.  At first it's not too bad but after a while it starts to get really hectic so you better make sure to grab those life-ups because catching a stray bullet to the face is extremely easy.  There are also other temporary power ups to make dying less of an issue or special guns that make murdering hordes of enemies just a little bit easier.

The game also has a few side quests to do which give decent rewards and don't feel merely like busywork.  The first side quest is monster cards which is a system where every monster has a card that it has a low percentage chance to drop.  When the card drops and you kill a certain amount of that monster then you can use your money to buy a badge to upgrade your ship.  This sounds like it would be mindless grinding but there is so many enemies in a given area that you can play normally and get the card AND the required number of kills for the badge.  The other are these fetch quest type deals where it tasks you to collect X of a certain item from a certain enemy.  Once again this sounds like it would be complete bullshit but you don't actually have to hand them in.  Once you get the items the quest is done and the reward is just dumped into your inventory which saves you the hassle of going back and forth so I have to give them props for that design choice.

The game can get a little monotonous if you play it for long stretches of time but it's the kind of game where you can save absolutely anywhere so if you do suddenly end up getting bored you can quit without having to worry about save points or any of that crap.  My biggest complaint is with the final dungeon where I kept taking damage from bullets that I couldn't fucking see.  The bullets are either red or bright blue and while the bright blue ones were easy to avoid the red ones would sometimes blend into the background and you couldn't see them properly, it's bullshit.

But apart from that Sweezy Gunner is actually a pretty good game.  It's cheap on Steam and takes up barely any disc space so if you like shmups or Metroid clones then I suggest that you give this one a go.

Being a Budget Gamer

The one thing I hear quite often from people when it comes to gaming is "it's such an expensive hobby".  Well partly, they are right as gaming can be pretty pricy.  However, if you are on a budget or have no money, that doesn't mean you can't game or have to give up gaming in order to save the pennies as there are plenty of ways to get your digital entertainment for little to no money.  So here's a couple of points on how to manage as a gamer on a budget.

1.  Face the fact that you ain't playin' the latest shit

See that Xbox One and PS4 sitting on the shelf of your local video game retailer?  Yeah, fuck that shit, you ain't playin' that for a while.  One of the disadvantages is that there is no way in hell you're going to be able to play the latest stuff but there is a workaround to this situation.  If you are lucky enough to have friends who own PS4s, Xbones or WiiUs then head round to their house and go play their shit.  Don't be a mooching little asshole though, buy them a 6-pack or something for their trouble.

2. Go Retro

Gaming has been around for a pretty long time now and that means there is TONS of old shit for you to be playing.  If you're like me and you live in Japan, the retro shops can sell stuff for pretty cheap.  Splash out one time for a Famicom dual system thing and then there are tons of 100-500 yen carts for you to be enjoying.

But lets say you don't have ANY money to spend, there are tons of emulators and sites that provide ROMS that can give you plenty of shit to play for free.  Some would argue this is piracy, which is kind of true I guess but then again if you emulate something like the fucking ZX Spectrum I'm sure no one is really going to give a shit and those games are plenty fun.

I mean we're talking about a system so old that the games came on fucking TAPES.  To be brutally honest, if you're going to complain about piracy on a tape-based system from 1982 then you need a fucking slap.

3. Get Steam

I don't care what your stance is on DRM or whatever the fuck, Steam is great.  If you have no money to spend, then steam provides a load of shit free to play and while some of these games are a bit hit and miss, the point is that they all cost ZERO FUCKING MONEY.

If you take the two biggest free to play games which are Team Fortress 2 and DotA2, then there are actually ways that you can make steam credit by playing these games.  Sit there and grind out some cosmetic items then trade and sell your way up on the steam marketplace.  Once you have some steam credit, wait for a seasonal steam sale and BAM! now you're rolling in fucking games and you didn't spend a penny.

There are plenty of other ways to save money if you're poor or even just a cheap bastard but these are just 3 of the best in my opinion.  Enjoy your cheap video games