Wednesday 4 December 2013

Sega! Drop Sonic and Revive the Following....

So, anyone who has played a Sonic game past Sonic Adventure 2 Battle knows that Sonic is basically a giant pile of steaming shit.  Even if the last few games have been passable, they still aren't anywhere nearly as good as they used to be.  All any Sonic fan ever wants is for Sega to release a good, fast Sonic game devoid of all his stupid fucking friends (except maybe Tails) but this never ever happens.

So it's about time Sega just admit it, they aren't going to make another Sonic game that will ever live up to it's legacy, ever.  So here is what Sega should do; drop Sonic and breath life into 3 dead titles and try to actually put some effort into making them so that all the long forgotten fans like me and many others can get mad hype and throw all our money into the Sega coffers.

So if they were to do this, which 3 titles should be brought back from the dead?  Well let me tell you!

1. Shenmue

This is a fucking no brainer, right here.  Just go and look at the recent twittering from tons of fans basically begging for a Shenmue 3.  The ones that aren't begging for a Shenmue 3 are begging for a Shenmue 1+2 HD Collection.  WHY ARE THEY NOT DOING THIS?!  If Sega released a Shenmue 3 and a HD Collection, they would be swimming in so much money that they would be able to afford to provide every employee with their own private jet and still have money left over to fund the other 2 games I'm about to suggest.  Seriously Sega, get a clue and get on this fucking project already, jesus christ man.

2. Vectorman


If you don't know what Vectorman is, you are seriously missing out.  This was a game released in 1995 on the Mega Drive and it was a side scrolling game where you played as a robot shooting the ever loving shit out of loads of other robots.  The cool thing about this game was that the visuals were really slick for it's time.  Cool backgrounds, some interesting levels, vectorman animated all cool like, it was amazing.  On top of that he had this thing where he could transform into different thinks like a robot fish, a drill, a bomb, a frog, a train...all sorts of shit.  There was a Vectorman 2 but that was America only so I never played it, and still haven't.  There was some talk of a Vectorman 3 for the PS2 but it looked fucking terrible so it got cancelled. 

So Sega, NOW is that time to dig out this title, go get a new developer to begin work on a proper Vectorman 3 and keep all that charm that the first game had, none of that grimdark "I'm a serious robot" shit you were planning in the first place.  3D is fine, but just make sure it looks and plays good.  I dunno, release it on the WiiU or something and let us customise Vectorman on the fly with the touchscreen or some shit, just get on it.

and finally! 3. Dynamite Cop

If you owned a Sega Saturn you may know of a game called Die Hard Arcade.  If you don't know Die Hard Arcade, here is a video of me and my friend being shit at it.

Man that was a long time ago....what a terrible video......

Anyway, Die Hard Arcade actually had fuck all to do with Die Hard and it Japan it was called Dynamite Deka.  Dynamite Cop on the Dreamcast was the sequel to Die Hard Arcade and known as Dynamite Deka 2 in Japan.  Now with that confusion out of the way, these games are great beat em' up games that need to be brought back. 

Make a classic 3D beat em' up like this, maybe add in some online co-op play, maybe a 4 player option, improve that combat systems and whatnot and there's a good modern game there.  It's been a long LOOONG time since we saw a proper beat em' up and it would be nice if this genre saw a bit of a revival in the next gen. 

I know that if Sega said they were working on a Dynamite Deka 3, then I'd buy at least 20 copies, just sayin.

So that's it, get rid of that blue idiot and bring back these 3 great games.  We get great games, you get boatloads of money, seriously, heed my advice!


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